Why we turned the TV off for good

Until the spring of 2010, we had DirectTV with the recording feature. We recorded a few different series and watched them all at once, fast-forwarding through commercials and patting ourselves on the back for saving all that time!

That was the spring when we got hooked on the idea of a boat. We were a young couple with career-track professional roles, living in a neighborhood near a lake and wanted to spend our weekends floating lazily and napping in the sunshine. (Obviously, this was before our children were born! We haven’t had anything similar ever since).

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We had spent the past five years really focusing on aggressively paying off our enormous student loan burdens, and didn’t love the idea of more debt. Ultimately, we decided that we would only get a boat if we could cut the payment amount out of our regular monthly spending.

There were three major changes we made at that time, and probably a few smaller ones that I don’t remember now. All of these major changes deserve a lot more discussion in the future!

First, I took back responsibility for cleaning. I worked a full time job with long hours at that point and had hired a monthly housekeeper. However, it was easy to maintain tidiness with two adults, and I generally cleaned during the month myself anyway. This expense was easy to eliminate.

Secondly, we refinanced the house. Those were the days of ultra-low 30 year mortgage rates and it made sense at the time to lower our rate and restructure our payment. Again, another easy budgetary modification.

Third, we eliminated our television service completely. That simple act was totally life-changing!

At first, we swapped all of our TV time for boat time. Friday nights, formerly our TV binge night, were spent completing chores and errands that otherwise would have been scheduled for the weekend. We would spend all Saturday and much of Sunday enjoying time on the lake. The days were spent swimming if the weather was warm or, in cool weather, cuddled up on the bow reading magazines. We frequently invited friends to go out with us, but most of the time, we simply enjoyed the peaceful days as a couple.

When the weather became too cool to use the boat, we didn’t turn the television back on. Our weekends were busy- we spent chilly weekend evenings by our fire pit, listening to music and drinking wine. We had friends over for dinner. Since we still had a DVD player and our old (circa 1997!) television set, we occasionally rented a movie from the Red Box machine at our local grocery store.

On our regular at-home evenings, we found ourselves with time to think, to be creative, and to read. We would sit next to each other on the couch, listening to an audiobook and flipping through our favorite magazines. I actually read a few cookbooks. We talked about things we were interested in learning or doing. We crossed projects and tasks off the to-do lists.

When I became pregnant with our first child, a friend suggested that I might want to go ahead and turn the TV service back on. After all, what is a childhood without cartoons? And what else do kids do with their time?

But we never did, and they haven’t missed it. Yes, they watch short (30-45 minute) DVDs from our limited selection one or two times a week. Our favorites include the Veggie Tales Bible stories (such as this one), Sesame Street’s Count With Me, LeapFrog Letter Factory, the Little Pim language immersion series and a few others. I use them as rewards, or to keep the kids corralled while I bring packages inside, or to buy me some staring time with my coffee cup and a blank wall.

But these are the exception, not the rule. Usually, we fill our days with reading aloud, exploring outdoors and going on field trips. The girls spend independent time coloring, dressing up their dolls, and pretending to be princesses, bats or mermaids while I fold laundry and cook our meals.

Originally the decision was a trading of expenses- a way to reallocate funds in our budget. It has been so much more than that, though. Turning off the TV has allowed us the brain space and time to be and do more. We are more creative, we accomplish more, read more, go outside more, and we spend a lot more time interacting with each other. Those things are high on the wish list of most people- certainly of most mothers!

What about you? Are you spacing out in the evenings, but find yourself racing the clock during the day? Do your kids revert to requesting the television, rather than a read-aloud or (also wonderful) just entertaining themselves? What about your relationship with your spouse- is it easier to be together when you are watching something, or can you have a screen-free evening without difficulty?

If you find yourself curious about what life would be like without the TV on, perhaps it’s time to do something about it. Obviously, going cold-turkey is one option. But if that’s too extreme for either you or your spouse, consider just physically turning the television off!

Start out by reducing the time it is on by 30 minutes a day (and completely eliminating the time it is on just for “background noise”). Use the extra time to complete one extra chore, read a few picture books to your kids, or even just drink a cup of tea while they play with playdough on the front porch. Pick up a box of Table Topics (one of my favorite “games” ever!) and ask your spouse a question or two.

Obviously, 30 minutes every day is not a lot of time, but it’s enough to create a habit in your household or to repair a relationship. Ultimately, the more you choose to turn the television off, the easier it will become, and the more control you will have over your own life.

I’d love to hear about how reducing TV time has changed your family life! What things you are doing instead. What is working for you? What isn’t? I can’t wait to hear from you!